Simplicity, for me, means taking the pressure off. Claiming space for what I need. What our family needs. Listening and trusting that inner voice. Allowing myself to be. To be present.
To reduce the clutter, inner and outer. To be conscious of what is here and now.
Life and parenting can be hard at times, especially when we’re too stressed. It can be hard to know what you need. Hard to remember to trust your gut. To hear what you already know to be true.
When there’s too much going on, it can feel like too much to bear.
I’ve been there. I’ve had moments where I’ve felt like it would be easier to have run away and wished for a new life.
This is coming from a woman who was so utterly committed to becoming a mother that I ate bok choy in the morning and had acupuncture needles every week for close to two years. I wanted to be a mom. I am a mom. A grateful lucky mom. And I’ve had
moments of feeling like it was too much. Too much accumulated stress. Small and big stuff.
Except you don’t know your strength until you get through it – life’s challenging moments. But in those moments, even if you may lose hope or trust, know that you’re not alone.
“We are like the little branch that quivers during a storm, doubting our strength and forgetting we are the tree- deeply rooted to withstand all life’s upheavals” – Dodinsky
One of my saving graces has been to simplify (and know that reducing the pressure was not a sign of weakness but of strength).
We simplified out of necessity and with time we deepened our connection, sense of calm and courage.
Our pressure is probably something different than yours. But pressure is pressure.
You know when you feel it and it’s not healthy. Or rather maybe you aren’t aware of its impact. Pay attention. Listen and you will see.
And our kids feel this pressure too. They feel it whether we know it or not. A different source of pressure. But pressure is pressure.
Listen.
The biggest pressure of all that we can change is the pressure to get it all right. To do it (mothering, healing, living) perfectly. And the pressure to do it like someone else.
I had to adjust my expectations. I took the pressure off myself.
There is no right way. There are one and a million ways.
There is no one other like you. This is your life, your story, your journey.
You are in charge of the things that you can be in charge of. We need to trust, surrender and hope for the best.
Simplifying can be as simple as taking a pause. Lighting a candle. Saying “No, thank you.” Setting a boundary. Turning down the volume.
Remember this. It’s all okay just the way it is. Life’s not perfectly neat and organized. You can make small changes toward creating a life that is aligned to what matters most to you, but you don’t need to do it all over night.
One step at a time.
Simplifying doesn’t take all of life’s stresses away, but it certainly can make the stresses more bearable. Or it did for us.
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference. – Reinhold Niebuhr
Lynne Newman is a resilient woman, wife and mom. After supporting hundreds of families during challenging times as a a registered Occupational Therapist, she experienced her own Divine Storm.
She was called to step up her game, to bring her health to a whole new level when she suffered two miscarriages and months of infertility. As she began her research into the mind-body connection, she embarked on a journey of extreme self-care, simplifying and holistic health. All of which was preparing her for the day her husband was diagnosed with life threatening cancer.
She is now offering coaching services which combine all of her skills, knowledge and insight, to give you the hope and strength to overcome the struggle that you face.