When our firstborn turned one, my husband and I made the call to cancel our cable TV. Since our son was too young for it (and always around), it seemed a wasted monthly payment and an easy place to save 40 dollars a month. It was just an experiment, and I fully expected I’d return in a couple of years to my (then) everyday life of constant streaming news, commercials, and background noise to whatever else we were doing.
While reading Simplicity Parenting, I had to laugh when Kim John Payne described the television in the living room as a grown “Uncle Andy” who’s moved in and is sitting all day, every day, on the couch — always talking, often telling the kids things that are inappropriate, things that stress them out, and convincing them the toys or clothes they have are not as good as the newest ones that just came out. I realized this had been true for me, too – and not what I wanted for my kids. Kim gives the very sobering reminder that the television is not a family member. Kick him out of the living room, he says, at least while the kids are young.
When we moved to our new house last year, we did kick the TV out of the living room. We signed on for cable once again, so we do still enjoy a few shows now and then, but the appliance itself no longer has front and center stage in our living area. Instead, the living room centers around the piano, guitar, and a box of instruments for the kids. After a year of this new arrangement, I can easily say it’s the best “small change” we’ve ever made. It’s the small change that really wasn’t small at all.
Just a few things I’ve noticed in the last year since “Uncle Andy” is no longer talking or even available in the living room:
- My 4 year old rarely (if ever) asks for shows to entertain him as part of his day. He’s got plenty of other ideas for spending his time – catching bugs, digging holes, making up stories and songs!
- When shopping with the kids at the store, I feel I still hold more influence over them than advertisers do. My oldest notices the cartoon characters and even recognizes a couple of them on packaging, but he doesn’t get upset when I explain we won’t be buying the string cheese Sponge Bob is endorsing that day.
- As I clear dishes from dinner, it’s much more likely that my husband and the boys are in the living room making music together. This is one of my favorite new family traditions, which I know was born out of the absence of TV providing pre-packaged entertainment!
- In my own life, I feel a much-needed return to what I always knew was important, but couldn’t quite attain before. I don’t feel so pressured to have certain clothes or the latest gadget, and the time and space that has opened in my life is invaluable.
- Lastly, though I am still aware of current events, I no longer feel overwhelmed with them, as I did when CNN streamed constantly into the living room. I understand there is trouble in the world, but I no longer feel it will win ultimately. I feel empowered to make a difference, to work, in my little corner of the world, to build a climate of hope, to raise boys who will have confidence to work for peace and respond to the trouble in the world with transforming love.
All this gained from simply moving an appliance to another room.
That’s a small change I am happy to make permanent!
